we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize