Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
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