So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Randomize
