we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
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