please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Randomize
