We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
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