i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
