Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
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