I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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