SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
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