omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
God I need to hump something, right now.
Randomize
