If that was your dad, he is hot
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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