she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
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