so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
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