what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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