some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
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