Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
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I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
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