I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
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