just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Randomize
