I cheated on you last night. I slept with my laptop.
What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
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