I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
My life is pants optional.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
