Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
Randomize
