If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
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Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
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