I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize
