there were more penises there than on chat roulette
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Randomize
