I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
Randomize
