We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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