plz talk dirty to me
i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
The air taste purple.
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