I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize
