are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
Randomize
