North Korea, Best Korea!
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
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