Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
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