You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
