I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
Randomize