So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
Randomize
