my vag is so smooth its legendary
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
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