You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Randomize
