brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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