Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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