your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Randomize
