i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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