Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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