Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
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