Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Randomize
