they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
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