Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
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