so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
Randomize
