I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.