do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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