Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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