It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
how do flat chested girls get laid?
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
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There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
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