my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Randomize
