If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
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